The heartbreaking reality of "granny dumping" and how families can better support ageing loved ones this Christmas
This week on Brisbane’s Legal Lowdown, 4BC’s Carla Bignasca was joined by Attwood Marshall Lawyers’ Aged Care Paralegal and Accredited Aged Care Professional Bindy Marshall to engage in a profoundly moving and eye-opening discussion about an issue many families will come face-to-face with over the holidays: recognising when an elderly loved one needs extra help — and knowing what to do next.
The segment kicked off with a confronting topic that shocks most people hearing it for the first time: “granny dumping.” Bindy explained that, heart breaking as it is, hospitals and aged care facilities brace for it every December. Vulnerable older people — often confused, isolated, or already living with cognitive decline — are left at hospital doors or facilities with no ID, no support, and no one coming back for them until after the holiday season.
Bindy, who has worked closely with social workers and frontline aged-care teams, shared the very real impact this has on staff and residents during what should be the most connected time of year.
But the conversation wasn’t all bleak. Bindy also highlighted the efforts facilities make to foster a sense of belonging for residents spending Christmas without family — from festive meals and dancing to simple gestures of meaningful gifts. She encouraged families who can’t be there in person to organise FaceTime calls with their loved ones through staff or even drop off an extra gift for someone who may otherwise receive nothing.
The discussion then moved to one of the biggest practical challenges facing older Australians: aged care waitlists. Bindy shared timely insights for anyone beginning to notice subtle signs of decline in a parent or grandparent — the unopened mail piling up, slipping personal hygiene, forgetfulness, or a home that suddenly seems harder to maintain. Her message was clear: get on the waitlist early, even if support isn’t needed immediately. ACAT assessments may be improving, but packages are still delayed, with some people waiting many months for even low-level support.
Carla and Bindy also explored the short-term options available while waiting for government-funded services, including private home-care providers, the costs involved, and how families contribute to the cost to bridge the gap and get the support for a loved one in need.
A big focus of the segment was the emotional and legal complexities that arise when families disagree about care needs. Bindy offered compassionate, practical advice for navigating “the Brady Bunch effect” — blended families, clashing siblings, and differing beliefs about what Mum or Dad needs. She stressed the importance of understanding the role of a power of attorney, acting in the person’s best interests, and keeping lines of communication open.
The three crucial legal documents that every adult (not just older Australians) should have in place to protect their best interests, include:
- Enduring Power of Attorney: which clearly documents wishes around living arrangements, financial matters, and future care.
- Advance Health Directive: which outlines choices about end-of-life care and medical treatment.
- A current, well-written Will: which expresses how you want your estate managed and by whom.
Bindy brought warmth and deep practical knowledge to a topic many families struggle to talk about.
With Christmas only weeks away, her reminder was timely: stay connected, check in, and plan early to support the older people we love.
Carla: Thank you and welcome back to 4BC Afternoons and 4RO in Rockhampton. It is that time of the week, again, it is Brisbane’s legal lowdown with Attwood Marshall Lawyers where we explore legal issues that affect our community.
Now Christmas we know is just around the corner. Many families are soon going to be reconnecting with elderly relatives that they don’t get to see regularly, but for some, the holiday period can highlight some serious concerns about declining health, safety or even isolation.
I’ve just been informed about this term that I have seen with my own eyes, but I didn’t know that there was a popular term for it. It’s called Granny Dumping. It’s basically when older people are abandoned to hospitals or care homes during the festive season. It’s horrible and it is a travesty, and as a community and as a society we definitely have something to answer for it.
Today we’re joined by Attwood Marshall Lawyers paralegal and Accredited Aged Care Professional, Bindy Marshall to talk about how families can identify when extra care may be needed and what steps can be taken early. Thank you so much for joining us this afternoon, Bindy.
Bindy: Oh, thank you for having me.
Carla: You have such a wealth of knowledge and experience in this area, and it is, I mean, it’s a strange term, Granny Dumping, but it is a reality.
Bindy: It is a reality, and it’s quite heartbreaking when you see it firsthand and working closely with the hospitals, the social workers in the hospitals, it’s quite apparent, a lot of them actually clear two wings of the hospitals just in preparation for granny dump. Same as aged care facilities.
So, let me clear up what Granny Dumping is just so that our listeners understand. So it’s basically where they will take their loved one to a hospital to an aged care facility, strip them of ID, and leave them. I’ll be back in a minute, Mum. And off they trot on holidays, and they don’t come back for two or three weeks.
Carla: It does not happen.
Bindy: It does happen, hand on heart. It happens.
Carla: I’ve seen it where older people are in care or who are already in care facilities and they don’t have people or family whatever come to visit, at any other time of the year and let alone Christmas. But I cannot get my head around the fact that people would just leave a loved one at the front door, take their ID and everything off them. What if they’re already, you know, showing signs of cognitive impairment?
Bindy: That’s very common. Well, these are the types of residents that are being dropped off. These are the types because they are confused already. So therefore, it’s sit here and wait and they do as directed, sit here and wait and we’ll come back for you. And it doesn’t happen. It’s really sad.
Carla: That is. I’m still trying to get my head around the fact that people do that.
Bindy: Yeah, I know it’s quite confronting like I said. And when you go to an aged care facility at Christmas time because for the previous 10 years I have run the Aged Care We Care Appeal and it will kick off again next year. But we delivered 1500 gifts into aged care facilities, into hospitals for those without family or friends who are isolated in care and it is heartbreaking. You can imagine sitting there on Christmas Day watching a family open gifts with Nana or Pa. And there you are, sitting on the sidelines watching all the happiness take place and there’s nothing for you.
Carla: What do you do to help alleviate that social isolation?
Bindy: This is where the facilities come into their own. So, the facilities really step it up at Christmas time. They make it a real family environment. So, there’s a lot of festivities. No one’s left in their room on Christmas Day, everyone gets in and plays a part.
Sometimes it’s dancing, sometimes it’s a festive meal, sometimes it is the gift giving and the facility is majority of them actually give a gift to their residents. It might be personal toiletries. It might be something else of value. It might be a packet of hankies for an older lady or a wallet for an older gentleman, things that they deem to be quite important to that resident.
Carla: I mean, that’s the beauty of the people that care and nurses and aged care workers and everyone that put that love and time and care into those that need it the most, particularly around Christmas – is amazing and I’m sure there are people out there that had the opposite experience.
Bindy: Oh. Absolutely.
Carla: You know, without highlighting that I guess, what is the advice that you would give … maybe people, you know, family members that are in care, what’s the best thing that they can do if they have a loved one that’s in aged care or in a facility that might be feeling left out at Christmas time?
Bindy: My biggest thing is the facilities often will organise for you if you can’t get to your loved one at Christmas time, organise a FaceTime chat over a staff member’s phone. It’s really important for them to be able to connect somehow. If that’s a possibility, have a chat with the aged care facility.
The other thing is take an extra gift. If you’re going to visit Mum or Dad, take an extra male or female gift and drop it off to the facility. They will know what to do with it. They know who is on their own. They know who is sitting in their room just waiting for something to happen on Christmas Day. So, do your part and just take a little something else for a male or female, and then that way you know, it spreads the joy and the and the kindness a little bit further, right.
Carla: Yeah, I mean I’m still wrapping my head around the fact that people would granny dump and it that it is awful, but it is important to reconnect with those that may not have the support of loved ones or who just are an inconvenience. There really is something to be said about our society.
Now when it when it comes to wait lists, we’ll talk about aged care. Wait lists are growing. They know that there’s, you know, provisions in place and changes that are meant to be in place to alleviate that stress. But it hasn’t happened. It’s only getting worse. How important is it to get onto an aged care wait list early?
Bindy: Look, it’s essential. It doesn’t matter when you need the care. It’s not a case of if you need the care, it’s when you need the care. So, you register sooner rather than later and look if you’re having trouble with heavy laundry or you know, the corners of the sheets on the bed and things like that, you really should start to consider reaching out to a home care provider to get them help to help you be assessed, because it’s really important that you don’t struggle along. Because the more you struggle along, the worse your decline is going to get. When something can be put in place quite quickly to help you. So, there is good news on our ACAT wait lists at the moment. So just to highlight ACATs are being done sort of within three-to-four-week period at the moment which is fantastic.
So that’s a big tick. However, even if the approvals come through, it doesn’t mean the packages are there. So we still have this giant list waiting for packages. I’ve had a gentleman waiting since April this year, just for a Level 2 Home care package and that’s really to help him catch the bus.
Now, this gentleman’s 89 years old and he’s catching the bus. Poor sausage.
Carla: Yeah. It’s not. It’s not enough. And I don’t know if anyone has the answers, whether Canberra is doing enough to help alleviate that stress. You guys do the best that you can to provide the assistance to help people get, you know the right information and be as equipped as possible, as early as possible, as soon as possible, like you said. But what sort of support options do we have, you put those ACAT assessments in place, what sort of options do we have while we wait for you know, packages to be delivered, I guess?
Bindy: This is a really good point, because you don’t necessarily have to wait for an ACAT to be put in place to receive care. You can contact any aged care provider. It might be any home care provider. And they will come and provide you with private services.
It’s not as expensive as you think, so around $79 an hour, so that’s not going to break the bank.
Carla: Is that subsidised at all?
Bindy: No.
Carla: $79 is a lot.
Bindy: It is for a full pensioner. But yeah, if you have a family member that you’re waiting to have ACAT assessed, often the families will tip in and subsidise that cost, knowing that they can’t be there to deliver the services. So, they’re actually quite happy to tip in.
Carla: Well, that’s the sort of future that I’m looking at. My mum lives with us. And she’s great. She’s doing great. She’s single if anyone wants to date an octogenarian Thai lady. She’s sprightly as – and she’s good to go. But that is the future that I’m looking at. I can’t afford full aged care for her and as much as I love having her around, I have a toddler as well, so I’ve got these bookends of life where if something were to fall through the cracks, I would hate for something to happen to her and I don’t have the help around to help with her and her needs. So, something like this actually is something I probably should start looking into.
Bindy: Well, yes, if she is starting to struggle and you’re noticing that she’s starting to struggle, you know those signs of struggle that we all should be looking for. Is mum a little bit more forgetful? Or is the mail starting to stack up on the dining room table when you go to visit mum or dad? Or are you starting to notice they are not showering, and you can tell when someone doesn’t shower.
Carla: She’s good. She smells good, everyone. Anyone, any single gentleman out there? She smells good. We’re good.
Bindy: So you really know when the wheels are starting to fall off, but in your case it is best to register sooner rather than later. Knowing that that wait list is growing, ever growing. And it could be potentially 6 to 12 months before she gets a package.
So if you’re over the age of 65, well, then that’s something that you can consider.
If you’re still able bodied and you’re doing everything you would normally do. You’re vibrant, you’re living within the community and there are no issues, well then you would hold off on that. Because we don’t want people to register unnecessarily and clog up the system for people who really do need those essential services.
Carla: And immediately as well, I guess. For those of us, you know, who have families that disagree with the care, perhaps that you’re providing what can we do if siblings or other relatives have different views of the level of care that a loved one might need?
Bindy: That often happens. So, what we see is like the Brady Bunch effect, if you like, you’ve got the yours, mine and ours and everybody’s coming together and there’s always one that doesn’t agree.
So, usually they’re not the power of attorney, thank goodness. Usually. And they’re the ones that are going to create the change for mum or dad. Helping them age in place to stay at home and age with dignity, because that’s what we all want, right? We want to be able to stay in our homes as long as possible. So understanding your role as the power of attorney and sort of exercising that power with the rest of your siblings. Yes, you may fall out with them.
But it’s a gentle balance. You have to put your loved ones best interest first. You have to put that person first.
Carla: If you’ve got a question, my guest today from Attwood Marshall Lawyers is Bindy Marshall, an absolute gun in this field, a paralegal, accredited aged care professional. If you’ve got a question that you would like to ask Bindy of course the 4BC open line, thanks to watch smoke alarms is 133 882.Perhaps you find yourself in the same sort of situation and you might like some advice from Bindy. Now is the time to do it, it’s free and we’re here and we’re ready to take your call 133 882 is that number.
What about legal safeguards that families should think about when you undertake those conversations cause they’re tough conversations, and if you do have one family member or one party doesn’t agree whatever you know, there’s someone always throws the “it’s the freedom of speech”, “It’s the 5th Amendment” or whatever. What are the sort of actual legal safeguards that we can put in place that help protect everyone?
Bindy: First things first, that enduring power of attorney acts for you while you’re alive. So, you really need to have an enduring power of attorney put in place. And you really should have it done by a solicitor. The reason I’m saying that is because they will capture all of the information you need. The amount of enduring powers of attorney that I see where it gets to the section where it says extra detail about your wishes and it’s empty with a line through it. I’m horrified when I see that. So, you know, those are the things where you would put in there, I don’t want to go into an aged care facility. If I do have to and the doctors say I do, then I want to go to this one, because my friend Joan is in this one. Or I would like to age in place, exhaust my finances for as long as possible for me to be able to stay at home.
So the first ones first is the enduring power of attorney. The second one is the Advanced Health Directive. So that’s a really important document as well. It dovetails in with the enduring power of attorney, and you really should have the same supporter listed as on your enduring power of attorney on your Advanced Health Directive. That’s really important because otherwise you don’t want them undermining each other.
Carla: Right.
Bindy: So that’s a really important part. The Advanced Health Directive for those who don’t know what that document is, it’s a document that expresses your wishes. So, it might be like my gentleman today. I would like to pass away in a nursing home. I do not want to pass away in a hospital. I just want someone to hold my hand. I don’t want…. I know. It’s heartbreaking, right? But these are the wishes that you need to have recorded. I don’t want fluids to extend my life. If I need them for my health, great. If I don’t, I don’t want life prolonging measures. So, these are the types of things that yes, it can be confronting to go through those questions, but it’s really, really important to document it because you know what you and I are not mind readers. We can’t tell what your mum wants unless you have the awkward conversation.
And then the last thing is your will. Make sure you have your will in place that expresses your wishes. If you don’t want to leave anything to the kids and you want to leave it to the koalas, well all power to you. No one has the right to tell you how to write your will or what instructions you should put in there. The same as the power of attorney.
Carla: Well, I’m glad that we have professionals like you and the rest of your team at Attwood Marshall Lawyers, because you can make sense of all of this in what could be a tricky or difficult, sticky situation and just make it a whole lot clearer for us because we’re all doing our best and sometimes things fall through the crack. And I’m particularly bad at life admin. So I’m glad for your services and I’m glad that you come in here every week and help us sort of decipher those situations. Bindy, I know that it’s a very special, important celebration for you next week. Happy birthday to you. It’s a milestone birthday. Happy 21st!
Bindy: Thank you very much. I’ll take it.
Carla: You’re doing great, and you are vibrant and have a great, wonderful celebration. Thank you for joining us today on afternoons.
Bindy: Oh, thank you for having me.
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